The Litmus Test of Facebook Friends

According to the be all-end all, of information on the internet- Wikipedia, the main use of litmus is to test whether a solution is acidic or basic...so what does this have to do with Facebook friending you ask?  Well...I recently had a conversation with a fabulous friend of mine where we were discussing a project I am working on and whether or not I have a "market" out there.  She questioned me on my large number of Facebook friends...to which I replied "I only have around 700."  I think if she had the physical capability of reaching through the phone and whacking me over the head with a rolled up newspaper, she would have done so!  Of course she made the obvious remark of "pssshhh yeah ONLY 700"...to which I responded, "well there are so many with 1000, 2000 or even 3000 friends...my 700 pales in comparison to that!"  

And then she said something that opened my eyes...cleared my vision...moved the clouds of naivete from my weary head....she told me, "those people don't have 3,000 friends...they just troll their friends Facebook pages and add them on.  They get business cards throughout the day and 'add them to their network'.  They don't actually know them..know them."  I gasped at the thought of that...what a strange, obscure and unthinkable concept!  

Why the heck would anyone add a person to their Facebook page if they didn't know them?  I mean I totally understand the whole concept behind "hoeing" yourself on LinkedIn--- it is a professional networking arena, for Pete's sake!!!  I am almost sure that if you looked up the word "networking" a drop down in the synonym tab would be the word hoe.  I would, however, like to point out that on LinkedIn we are referred to as "connections" not friends---once again, professional networking at its finest, LOVE LINKEDIN!!!!  Brilliant tool!

Whoa---got a little off track---sorry, I just get so excited about LinkedIn!  Now back to the topic at hand---with the exception of celebrities and politicians or other public figures who use Facebook as a social media TOOL---why would anyone "friend" another person on Facebook without knowing them?  It seems to be an odd thing to me?  Are there really people out there that troll others pages to allocate a large amount of friends so they can say they have 3,000 Facebook friends?  This simply can not be! I receive many requests to be a persons friend on Facebook that I have turned down because I simply do not know them personally.  I even had people who were lame enough to try to friend me on my personal Facebook account who have openly spoken ill of me or purposefully did harm to me---as much as I am all for forgiveness and moving on in life, I am not that two-faced that I would list them as a friend on a personal networking arena..sorry but I basically enjoy looking at myself in the mirror without remorse of what I am looking at:)

So then, of course, this prompted me to think about what the benchmark would be?  What is The Litmus Test of Facebook Friends for myself?  Would I have this person over to my house for dinner?---nah...too much pressure!  Would I stand as a reference for this person on their resume?---nah...I have a TON of friends that I adore but would never be their resume reference...that is for a whole other posting!  I finally figured out what it was---If I saw them would I stop to have a conversation with them!  Yes that was it---that was my Litmus Test for Facebook friends!

Of course, this meant that I had to go check my friend list--- I wanted to make sure that I was not being a hypocrite and actually knew all of my friends on the list..AND would have a conversation with them if I saw them on the street!  I am very proud to say that yes I would...all 700+ of them!  Some I knew better than others...some I only went to high school with, or worked a brief time with...but I did know all of them and I would definitely have a conversation with them!

So there it is folks---my Litmus Test for Facebook Friends!  Remember the litmus is to test whether a solution is acidic or basic, and depending on how you view life you may want to make up your own Litmus Test for Facebook Friends---see whether they are acidic or basic!  And if you take anything away from Miss Michelle today it should be to remember that it is ok to be "hoeing" yourself on LinkedIn (your career depends on it) :) but not on Facebook!  Now, to each his own and may you all be well in your social media networks!

Malama Pono<<<Google it!!!

#39 Checkity Check Check!!! The Giving Tree!!!

Every once in a while you are able to be a part of something that really is amazing!!! I had the great joy of providing storytime to a wonderful group of cuties at a local preschool this morning---what an experience!  I got to sit through their sharing time first...HILARIOUS!!!  The cutie on the bottom left of the picture brought his cell phone (an obviously inoperable one his parents let him knock around with for fun) and was insistent that he had to take a call from his girlfriend--while he was presenting!  They also had a great good morning song and routine that was so full of excitement and smiles I actually almost cried!  I think because my kids are teenagers I have forgotten what that bright eyed and bushy tailed 4 year old is like.  They were so excited for simple things---like singing a song---or having the details of their outfit pointed out as the teacher went around the circle!  (But let's face it---who doesn't like the details of their ensemble of the day pointed out...love those shoes girl!)

The next joy I had was in presenting one of my favorite books of all time...The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein!  If you have not read this story yet then you really need to get out there and purchase a copy for your personal library!  It is a book on true happiness...true friendship...true ALOHA---and that's what this birthday deal is all about right???;)  As I began the storytime I opened the cover and saw the writing of one of my dearest friends Tiffani.  She had given me that book for Christmas 1992, and I was immediately taken back to those great times for us together in 1991-3.  

Here is the writing in the cover...and that is a pic of us at the Retrix Dance Club in 1991---bad pic I know...we have been friends ever since---22 years strong!

So as I was reading to these incredible kids about how this tree and boy were friends and as they progress through life, find out what truly brought joy to this tree---it was obvious to me that these young minds completely understood what brought that tree joy...they shouted out "it's because she was sharing!"  Yes....that's right---the tree was happy when she was giving and sharing---spreading ALOHA!!!:)

Who knew this is what I would gather from this experience?  Maybe we need to be more like the tree...or maybe we should just be more like these 4 year olds who are excited to share and give of their love and time so freely!  Thinking like a 4 year old also affords you an opportunity to only worry about things such as: sharing time, Halloween costumes, and whether or not mom is gonna make a batch of chocolate chip cookies---yeah those were the good ole days!

Stay tuned as I continue to report on the 40 Random Acts of Aloha!!!!

Malama Pono <<< google it;):):)

40 Random Acts of Aloha

I feel like I have been waiting for the ushering in of this decade for FOREVER!!!  My sister is 10 years older than me and has the great pleasure of ringing in the big "whatever-0" there is to ring in and tell me all about it!  She has been professing for quite some time that the 40s were the best!  I have had a similar view---I can't wait to turn 40 because it takes me further and further away from my stupid 20s (bad era---).  Seriously, how many savvy 20 somethings do you know?  

My 30s were just rough...full time school and kids in the first half---personal heartbreak, a PhD education in politics (of all forms), and painful career lessons learned in the 2nd half!  Here I am on the cusp of my new decade and can't wait to get crackin'!  

I think for a woman, her 40s bring a new sense of liberation because she knows who she is and what she wants in life; she is very aware of what kind of people she chooses to allow in her circle of friends--and truly knows how to cherish those friendships and be a friend...MOST of the time her kids are older so she is not defined by her motherhood---but instead embraces it and hopes that she can finish the marathon strong; she is also usually humbled by life and has learned how to self-assess and realize that #1) She doesn't need to be perfect---because she never will be, #2) Knows that saying sorry is the sign of a truly mature person #3) Knows what her strengths are and hits those out of the park using them for good---also knows her weaknesses and how to temper those when they flare up! Yeah the 40s are looking pretty darn good to me right now!  I feel so sorry for all those women who waste their days worrying about wrinkles and age spots---those are badges of honor baby---wear them with pride!!!

To celebrate the BIG 4-0 I always thought I was going to have a huge pimped out party---but it didn't turn out that way and I think it happened to lead me to this single moment!  As I was perusing the internet one night I came across a news story about a man handing out $5 bills to celebrate his 65th birthday http://shine.yahoo.com/work-money/man-celebrates-65th-birthday-giving-away-free-money-174400395.html .  I was absolutely inspired and realized that this was in harmony with what makes me most happy in life---making other people happy!  So I began to thoughtfully create my concept and decided upon these 40 Random Acts of Aloha (the "aloha" obviously taking place of the more commonly used "kindness"---because it had to have a little Miss Michelle bling in the title).  Most of the acts will take place between October 17-19, but some will occur earlier.  I can testify to the great joy that comes from putting others before yourself and finding joy in the joy of others!

Please join me in celebrating my 40th birthday by one of the following:

• Donate an item to the care package I will be sending my friend Jeff Hickman and his peeps overseas protecting our country (#34)!  You can either bring them by my house or call me and I will pick it up (I will be sending it out on October 19th) The items are as follows and in a soldiers own words:  
• " dryer sheets (good smelly kine, we put them in our rucksacks and in a lot of our stuff to prevent smellage), 
• nut and granola mixes (tasty, healthy snacks are not abundant, if HI had a Trader Joes, we would be skinnier), 
• Crystal Light drink mixes (the individual packets, we drink tons of water, and that gets old), 
• good name brand Q-tips,
• Lysol or Clorox wipes (they have a disinfectant, any wipe brand is okay as long as it kills germs, we have tons of baby wipes available, but none that kill germs) 
• and the last thing I can think of, A&D ointment (baby diaper rash kine, again, any brand, but rash from walking is not fun). 
• Hardcandy or any kind of flavored cracker are good fall backs. "

• Join me on September 29th in making leis to hand out at Williams Field Airport (#8)

• Donate to my Food Drive (#31) on October 5th benefitting St. Mary's Food Bank things needed are:
• Beans
• Canned fruits and veggies
• Canned soups, stews, chilis and pastas
• Cereal
• Juice
• Peanut Butter
• Rice

• Join me on my actual birthday, October 17th, in handing out QT cups at the location on Ellsworth Loop (#25)

• Join me on October 18th handing out leis at Williams Field Airport (#8)

• On October 17th, complete a random act of kindness on your own or feel free to use one of mine below:

1.       Take a meal to a family you know

2.       Take a widow flowers

3.       Take a neighbors paper laying out in the driveway to them

4.       Bring in your neighbors trash can

5.       Leave a kind note for a family member

6.       Give a gas card to someone getting ready to pump gas

7.       Do my children's chores for the day

8.       Go to Williams gateway Airport and handout lei’s to people coming in from a flight

9.       Provide a treat or lunch to the  teachers and staff at the kids school

10.   Write a thank you note to a mentor

11.   Leave an extra big tip for wait staff

12.   Invite someone new over for dinner

13.   Make 40 people smile

14.   Push in some shopping carts

15.   Buy a stranger a free pizza

16.   Slip paper hearts that say “It’s Random Act of Kindness day...Have a great day!!!” under peoples windshields

17.   Send a letter to some former teachers letting them know the difference they made in your life

18.   Give a Wal-Mart gift card to someone in line

19.   Send flowers to a teacher that has dedicated their life to teaching children

20.   Anonymously help someone you know is having financial hardship

21.   For one week, act on every single thought of generosity that arises in your heart

22.   Take donuts to the QC Fire Department

23.   Tape change to a soda machine

24.   Provide breakfast burritos for the day laborers on Ocotillo and Ellsworth

25.   Hand out 40 QT drink cups on my actual birthday (October 17)

26.   Pay for someone's meal behind me in the drive thru

27.   Add quarters to someone’s parking meter

28.   Purchase a meal for a homeless person

29.   Walk in to Olive garden and give them a giftcard

30.   Deliver fresh baked cookies to city workers

31.   Collect goods for the food bank

32.   Write a kind note to a friend

33.   Take donuts to the local police

34.   Send off a care package to a military member

35.   Make a donation to a church other than your own (Lady of Guadalupe)

36.   Donate to the local charity that is being sponsored by your grocer

37.   Tape popcorn to the Redbox for a movie night

38.   Take cookies to the dog groomer

39.   Provide a story time for kids at a local library or preschool

40.   Clip coupons and tape it to the items @ the store for people to use

      I am not sure how this blog thing works or if people will even see this, but i hope they do---because I want to know what everyone chose to do out there!  I want to see if my birthday was any worth to mankind and if people got out there and tapped into their inner kind streak!  It's all about the ALOHA---love is truly the most powerful- life changing thing in this world!  So tell your friends about this---help me celebrate my birthday by making a difference for at least 1 day!:)